I've been on this site for about two days. However, being that I'm the curmudgeonly and cagey sort, I've chosen to come up with a contingency plan just in case my latest foray into Internet dating doesn't work.
You may think that this is silly, but I beg to differ. I mean, look at the odds stacked against me! I'm a black woman (oh NOES!) who is over the age of 25 (those extra seven years...dang, I'm decrepit) on the Internet (read the OK Cupid OK Trends blog re: race and Internet dating responses to black women). I might as well forget it, amirite? Of course, I am. The media tells me so.
In preparation of my almost certain spinsterhood, I've come up with a plan to get me through my golden years. It's full of amusement, aim, and high-end kitty chow. It's as follows:
1) I purchase a house. It just has to be a normal house in suburbia. Ranch, split-level, yurt, grossly uninspired McMansion. Doesn't matter.
2) I clothe myself in flowered muumuus. I believe WalMart has a stunning collection. When I'm feeling particularly feisty, I can hit up the local JC Penney.
3) I purchase multiple numbers of a small, fuzzy animal. Ferrets? Kitties? Small, furry white dogs...which I love to death? Haven't decided. It just needs to be tiny and furry.
4) I buy cans of Fancy Feast. I feed said Fancy Feast to my small animals.
Then...here's the best part...
5) I take the cans of Fancy Feast and throw them at the neighborhood kids, because they'll invariably be on my lawn, and they must stay away from it. See! The continual target practice will help maintain my hand-eye coordination, keep my lawn looking spiffy, and will afford me plenty of exercise.
I think it's a great plan. A smart woman always needs a plan, and this one works as well as most.
Or, uh, someone could write me. :P
I've been on this site for about two days. However, being that I'm the curmudgeonly and cagey sort, I've chosen to come up with a contingency plan just in case my latest foray into Internet dating doesn't work.
You may think that this is silly, but I beg to differ. I mean, look at the odds stacked against me! I'm a black woman (oh NOES!) who is over the age of 25 (those extra seven years...dang, I'm decrepit) on the Internet (read the OK Cupid OK Trends blog re: race and Internet dating responses to black women). I might as well forget it, amirite? Of course, I am. The media tells me so.
In preparation of my almost certain spinsterhood, I've come up with a plan to get me through my golden years. It's full of amusement, aim, and high-end kitty chow. It's as follows:
1) I purchase a house. It just has to be a normal house in suburbia. Ranch, split-level, yurt, grossly uninspired McMansion. Doesn't matter.
2) I clothe myself in flowered muumuus. I believe WalMart has a stunning collection. When I'm feeling particularly feisty, I can hit up the local JC Penney.
3) I purchase multiple numbers of a small, fuzzy animal. Ferrets? Kitties? Small, furry white dogs...which I love to death? Haven't decided. It just needs to be tiny and furry.
4) I buy cans of Fancy Feast. I feed said Fancy Feast to my small animals.
Then...here's the best part...
5) I take the cans of Fancy Feast and throw them at the neighborhood kids, because they'll invariably be on my lawn, and they must stay away from it. See! The continual target practice will help maintain my hand-eye coordination, keep my lawn looking spiffy, and will afford me plenty of exercise.
I think it's a great plan. A smart woman always needs a plan, and this one works as well as most.
You're right, you don't know me in real life. And there is no need to account for your preferences. They are what they are for reasons entirely your own. And as a grown woman, you don't have to date anyone you don't want to. I found humor (actually laughted out loud) in the IRONY. Full stop.
Quoting venusdiva429
Thanks for the warm welcome, all. I try to have a sense of humor about dating. Come on, you have to laugh about dating, or you may end up crying a river over it. :P
LaNegrita: Thanks for the excellent emails, ma'am! You really are fab, just as I said on one of your posts.
GHorn: Last I checked, this blog is pretty obviously sarcastic, so I'm not really thinking that I'll end up an old maid. I'm a better writer than I thought if you believed this was serious. LOL.
Secondly...nope, don't think I know you in real life, which means that I have to account for my preferences...why?
That's right, I don't. As a grown woman, black or otherwise, I don't have to date anyone I don't want to, for any reason. Full stop.
I've seen black men not want to date black women. It's fine. It's their life. Unless they're paying my taxes, came out of the same womb, or are of the same family line, it makes no bloody difference to my life because they don't belong to me. However, they deserve love, just as any human does.
Quoting venusdiva429
Thanks for the warm welcome, all. I try to have a sense of humor about dating. Come on, you have to laugh about dating, or you may end up crying a river over it. :P
LaNegrita: Thanks for the excellent emails, ma'am! You really are fab, just as I said on one of your posts.
GHorn: Last I checked, this blog is pretty obviously sarcastic, so I'm not really thinking that I'll end up an old maid. I'm a better writer than I thought if you believed this was serious. LOL.
Secondly...nope, don't think I know you in real life, which means that I have to account for my preferences...why?
That's right, I don't. As a grown woman, black or otherwise, I don't have to date anyone I don't want to, for any reason. Full stop.
I've seen black men not want to date black women. It's fine. It's their life. Unless they're paying my taxes, came out of the same womb, or are of the same family line, it makes no bloody difference to my life because they don't belong to me. However, they deserve love, just as any human does.
You're right, you don't know me in real life. And there is no need to account for your preferences. They are what they are for reasons entirely your own. And as a grown woman, you don't have to date anyone you don't want to. I found humor (actually laughted out loud) in the IRONY. Full stop.
Thanks for the warm welcome, all. I try to have a sense of humor about dating. Come on, you have to laugh about dating, or you may end up crying a river over it. :P
LaNegrita: Thanks for the excellent emails, ma'am! You really are fab, just as I said on one of your posts.
GHorn: Last I checked, this blog is pretty obviously sarcastic, so I'm not really thinking that I'll end up an old maid. I'm a better writer than I thought if you believed this was serious. LOL.
Secondly...nope, don't think I know you in real life, which means that I have to account for my preferences...why?
That's right, I don't. As a grown woman, black or otherwise, I don't have to date anyone I don't want to, for any reason. Full stop.
I've seen black men not want to date black women. It's fine. It's their life. Unless they're paying my taxes, came out of the same womb, or are of the same family line, it makes no bloody difference to my life because they don't belong to me. However, they deserve love, just as any human does.
Thanks for the warm welcome, all. I try to have a sense of humor about dating. Come on, you have to laugh about dating, or you may end up crying a river over it. :P
LaNegrita: Thanks for the excellent emails, ma'am! You really are fab, just as I said on one of your posts.
GHorn: Last I checked, this blog is pretty obviously sarcastic, so I'm not really thinking that I'll end up an old maid. I'm a better writer than I thought if you believed this was serious. LOL.
Secondly...nope, don't think I know you in real life, which means that I have to account for my preferences...why?
That's right, I don't. As a grown woman, black or otherwise, I don't have to date anyone I don't want to, for any reason. Full stop.
I've seen black men not want to date black women. It's fine. It's their life. Unless they're paying my taxes, came out of the same womb, or are of the same family line, it makes no bloody difference to my life because they don't belong to me. However, they deserve love, just as any human does.
Welcome to Blogland, Venus. Your sense of humor should fit in just fine here. And I think that your lighthearted attitude about finding true love--or not--is exactly the kind of attitude that's going to attract your very own Mr. Right just when you least expect it.
You may not find him on here; there's a good chance you won't [which is true for all of us]. But my ancient instincts tell me he's out there right now looking for a gal just like you.
Keep smiling, Venus. And have a lot of fun here on the blogs.
Pat
Welcome to Blogland, Venus. Your sense of humor should fit in just fine here. And I think that your lighthearted attitude about finding true love--or not--is exactly the kind of attitude that's going to attract your very own Mr. Right just when you least expect it.
You may not find him on here; there's a good chance you won't [which is true for all of us]. But my ancient instincts tell me he's out there right now looking for a gal just like you.
Keep smiling, Venus. And have a lot of fun here on the blogs.
Welcome to MM blogland VenusDiva..I'm sure LaNegrita will give you some interesting perspectives based on being a "newbie" as well.
This site is what you make it, but IMHO hardly the Rosetta Stone of dating sites! I find some of the blogs and forums insightful ...You will definitely see a lot of robust discussions from members. I've enjoyed La's contributions as well as many of the posts/ topics others have shared here. I'm sure you'll fit right in....
Have fun; continue to enjoy life; stay true to you and the rest will come.
Sass
Welcome to MM blogland VenusDiva..I'm sure LaNegrita will give you some interesting perspectives based on being a "newbie" as well.
This site is what you make it, but IMHO hardly the Rosetta Stone of dating sites! I find some of the blogs and forums insightful ...You will definitely see a lot of robust discussions from members. I've enjoyed La's contributions as well as many of the posts/ topics others have shared here. I'm sure you'll fit right in....
Have fun; continue to enjoy life; stay true to you and the rest will come.
Call me crazy, but I find it interesting that a woman who posts on a blog complaining about having the odds stacked against her as a black woman is open to all ethnicities EXCEPT (drum roll please) black men. This poor, unfortunate black woman is open to love with anyone, anywhere...as long as the man is NOT black. This site gets more and more entertaining everyday...
Call me crazy, but I find it interesting that a woman who posts on a blog complaining about having the odds stacked against her as a black woman is open to all ethnicities EXCEPT (drum roll please) black men. This poor, unfortunate black woman is open to love with anyone, anywhere...as long as the man is NOT black. This site gets more and more entertaining everyday...
